I was grilled yesterday. Massively. And it hurt; man, it hurt really bad. Despite the fact that I spent most of my time in law school wishing for an opportunity to be cross-examined, when it came, I was completely unprepared for it. In large part, this is because I live in the real world.… Continue reading Law School Teaches You to be a Pitcher but Not a Catcher

First, a disclaimer: nothing contained herein is intended to imply that anything other than a dedication to hard work, honesty, and all the other requirements of our profession should be your norm. And really, those things should be enough to make you a successful lawyer. But in the times we live now, they’re simply not.… Continue reading Branding: Yet Another Thing You Never Learned in School

There’s something about lawyers. And I don’t mean all lawyers: I mean there’s something specifically about trial lawyers. It’s something a bit off-kilter, maybe a little annoying. Certainly off-putting. What is it about trial lawyers specifically and litigators in general that should concern you? [Disclaimer: I’m saying “us” because I’m a litigator. But let’s be… Continue reading The Problem With Trial Lawyers (Where do I begin?)

Several weeks ago I talked about the demands placed on me by the partners and other associates in my firm as well as all the other time zaps as a means of explaining why I work so much.  But this week, I want to get real and take some personal responsibility for my long hours.… Continue reading Why I Work So Much, Part Two a/k/a Feeling all the Feels

We all know that the practice of law demands long hours.  We went to law school knowing what was coming for us at the end.  All that hard work, late nights, studying studying studying.  It would just lead to more hard work and late nights.  And more studying.  But perhaps we weren’t completely prepared for… Continue reading Why I Work So Much, Part One a/k/a Eight Hours Isn’t Really Eight Hours

  Not that kind of sex. And in deference to the moot-court training I received in law school, I’ll give my answer at the beginning: not much. And now, my explanation. Don’t get me wrong: I completely get why feminism is important. It allowed women to leave their waitress and secretary jobs and become chefs… Continue reading How Much Sex Should We Have at Work?

Here we are: the exalted, brilliant, magical beings. Marvel at the power of our words, tremble as our heels clatter past you mere mortals cowering against the wall. Bow down before our plaques and certificates. We are the ones chosen from up high: we are the lawyers. And we are dicks. Because when the People’s… Continue reading Look Mommy! I Got a Certificate! a/k/a Why Are Lawyers Such Dicks